North Korea announced Dec. 12 that it had successfully launched a satellite into orbit atop a three-stage rocket. "The launch of the second version of our Kwangmyongsong-3 satellite from the Sohae Space Center in Cholsan County, North Phyongan Province by carrier rocket Unha-3 on December 12 was successful," North Korea's news agency, KCNA, reported. "The satellite has entered the orbit as planned." Efforts to launch a satellite last April failed when the rocket exploded moments after lift-off. This time, the effort appears to have succeeded. The US mobilized four warships to track the launch, and Japan's government issued orders to its military to shoot down any rocket debris that entered its territory. The first stage splashed into Yellow Sea, the second into the Philippine Sea north of Luzon Island; the third remains in orbit. This means North Korea now has the ability to go "exo-atmospheric"—a capacity that could be used in an inter-continental ballistic missile (ICBM). The US maintains the launch constitutes a test of long-range missile technology banned under UN resolutions.
The success—reportedly met with widespread (compulsory?) rejoicing throughout North Korea—follows numerous past attempts. Current ruler Jong Un’s father, Kim Jong Il, presided over flawed missile launches in 2006 and 2009. The launch seemed timed of the one-year anniversary of the death of Kim Jong Il last December. The launch also falls within the centennial year of the birth of North Korea's founding leader, Kim Il Sung, the incumbent's grandfather. But the launch may also be in response to an agreement by the United States last month allowing South Korea to build ballistic missiles with a range of 800 kilometers—that is, capable of targeting all of North Korea's territory. South Korean missiles, which fall under joint command with the US, were formerly limited to a range of 300 kilometers. South Korea is also developing its own satellite launch capability, with Seoul announcing postponement of its third attempt last month, after two previous failures. (Korea Policy Institute, ABC News, CNN, Quartz, Dec. 12; BBC News, Dec. 7; CNN, Nov. 29; CNN, Oct. 7)
North Korean rocket launch is good news…
…for Hollywood.
DPRK propaganda vid: sinister or just surreal?
File under "You can't make this shit up." From the New York Times, Feb. 5:
Actually, it does still appear to be on YouTube. See for yourself…
Shit is cray-cray, yo…
DPRK as surrealist theme park
An utterly bizarre March 2 CNN report, “5 ways North Korea keeps getting stranger,” lists as number five “Dreaming of annihilating the United States, to the tune of ‘We Are The World'”… But the others are just as weird.
1. Kim Jong Un: Dennis Rodman’s new BFF
If you read the reports about former NBA star Dennis Rodman’s visit to Pyongyang, you might have double-checked whether the story was just another Onion parody.
Not only did the American basketball star — known for his over-the-top publicity stunts — visit North Korea, but he also was joined by three members of the famed Harlem Globetrotters, who played against North Korea’s “Dream Team” (no surprise, the game ended in a tie). Rodman proclaimed Kim “a friend for life,” and appeared courtside with the North Korean leader.
Not everyone was cheering this so-called “basketball diplomacy.” A commentary in Canada’s National Post outlined North Korea’s “monstrous gulag system that Dennis Rodman will never see.”
2. Google executive urges country with barely any electricity to embrace the Internet
You’ve probably seen that NASA satellite photo of the Korean peninsula at night, the one that shows the northern half completely dark while the southern half and the Chinese coast are fully alight. Electricity is still a luxury in North Korea, where cold winds from nearby Siberia can plunge temperatures below freezing. But that didn’t stop Google’s executive chairman Eric Schmidt from visiting North Korea in January as part of a delegation urging North Korea to “make it possible for people to use the Internet.”
While many North Koreans might be more interested in having a heated home, Schmidt and his Google colleague Jared Cohen have advocated about the Internet’s ability to empower citizens living under oppressive regimes.
3. Famous Americans apparently aren’t the only ones heading to Pyongyang
In the wake of the Schmidt and Rodman visits, Bloomberg Businessweek looked at just how many Westerners are heading to North Korea for its closely monitored, government-run tours. Surprisingly, it found a nearly 20% increase in visits since 2011.
4. Get your North Korean education ... in Tokyo
The United States isn’t the only outside country that has a love-hate relationship with North Korea. Until the end of World War II, Korea was a Japanese colony, and many Koreans were brought to Japan — many against their will — before Korea was divided between north and south. More recently, North Korea admitted to kidnapping Japanese citizens from Japanese soil in the 1970s and 1980s, something Tokyo has demanded more answers about.
Despite this tense history, Japan hosts a number of North Korean-funded schools — complete with portraits of North Korea’s founder Kim Il Sung and previous leader Kim Jong Il on its walls. Students, who are mostly Japanese, say they are learning Korean culture and language, and laugh off suggestions that they’re training to be spies.
How long before even such bizarre embraces of globalization as these open up internal contradictions for North Korea’s rulers, as they have for China’s? We can only hope…
Cold War nostalgia in DPRK
Of course it is Fox News that is most aggressively waving this metaphorical bloody shirt. March 7:
Note incorrect use of parentheses (they should be brackets) and sloppy use of ellipses (three dots would have been sufficient). Meanwhile Fox's opposite numbers in the idiot-left International Action Center defend the DPRK against the unfavorable portrayal in the Red Dawn remake:
I wonder if Kang Pyo Yong and the makers of the Red Dawn remake are in league? We could think of less likely hypotheses…
Of course the bellicose outburst comes just as the UN Security Council voted to approve harsh new sanctions against North Korea in response to the recent nuclear test. (NYT, March 7) Around it goes…
Korean War nostalgia in DPRK
North Korea says it is scrapping all non-aggression pacts with South Korea, closing its hotline with Seoul, and shutting down the crossing point between the two countries, BBC reports.
There is a “crossing point”?
Kim Il Schwag
“North Korea to U.S: We Will Turn You Into A Sea of Fire But First Buy One of Our Groovy Organic US-Made Propaganda T-Shirts” reads the smart-alecky headline on Common Dreams. Click on the link for images of T-shirts and baseball caps with idealized socialist-realist portrayals of AK-wiedling soldiers against red-star flag backgrounds. Text:
Sales: 1% annoying true believers of the International Action Center variety; 99% annoying ironic hipsters of the Williamsburg variety.
(Tip o’ the propaganda baseball cap to Michelle Chen for pointing this out on Facebook.)
World War 4 Report prognosis on North Korea
We have determined: There will not be war on the Korean peninsula. Our reading of the facts tells us that all the saber-rattling is for show, creating a sense of realism for North Korea’s rulers to turn the country into a Cold War nostalgia theme park and rake in tourism dollars. This isn’t a joke, we’re absolutely serious.
Realism on Korean peninsula
We don’t mean political “realism.” We mean it in the artistic sense.
North Korea announced March 11 that it had officially “scrapped” the 1953 armistice agreement, with a military spokesman calling the new sanctions a “declaration of war and an act of war against the DPRK.” The North Korean leadership also failed to answer a hotline call from the South, and have apparently cut the line. The announcement comes as military drills involving South Korea and the United States are underway. The maneuvers, called Key Resolve, are in conjunction with the Foal Eagle joint exercises that began March 1 and are scheduled to last two months. More than 3,000 US troops are taking part in Key Resolve. (CNN, NYT, March 11)
Extravagent theater.
More realistic theater on Korean penninsula
Wow, is this cool or what? From Yonhap news agency, March 21:
High theatrics on Korean Peninsula
South Korea signed a new military plan with the US March 25, to counter what officials call North Korean “provocations.” The plan provides for a joint response in the event of an incursion or a limited attack from the North, such as that in 2010 when a border island was shelled. (BBC News, March 25)
While blame has not been definitievely fixed in the synchronized cyberattack on South Korea that paralyzed media and banking last week, unnamed Seoul “security experts” say the DPRK is preparing an army of “cyber-warriors” to target the South. (AP, March 24)
Korea drama a touch overheated
The US military on March 28 carried out a rare long-range mission over the Korean Peninsula, sending two nuclear-capable B-2 stealth bombers on a practice bombing sortie over the South Korea, and dropping dummy munitions on an island range. (NYT, AP) The Korean Central News Agency, mouthpiece of the DPRK, said the North Korean people were “burning with hatred” over the flights. (AP) Pyongyang said it has put its long-range missiles on stand-by, and threatened to “mercilessly strike” US bases in South Korea, Guam, Hawaii and the US mainland. (AFP, BBC World Service)
We saw this movie in 1950. Do we really need a remake?
North Korea said on March 30 it was entering a “state of war” with South Korea, and threatened to close a border industrial zone, the last remaining example of inter-Korean cooperation which gives the impoverished North access to $2 billion in trade a year. The US said it took Pyongyang’s threats seriously but cautioned that the North had a history of “bellicose rhetoric.” (Reuters)
Korea drama borders on histrionic
Could you guys please tone it down a little? From The Telegraph, April 3:
Yes, very “measured.” As if North Korea stands any chance of hitting Guam (other than maybe by accident). From CBS, April 2:
“Not believed to have.” Really hedging our bets, aren’t we. More from CTV, April 3:
Which of course it doesn’t actually have. And from CNN, April 3:
Not to loan any support to the idiot left factions shilling for the DPRK (really) but why does the US get to decide who gets to be a “nuclear state” and who doesnt? I mean, the US is massively subsidizing nuclear Israel and Pakistan, and is not living up to its own responsibilities to seek disarmament under the Non-Proliferation Treaty. But we’re not supposed to talk about that.
Theater, for the moment. Let’s hope life doesn’t start imitating art.
Obama flips the script on Kim Jong Un …for the moment
OK, giving credit where it is due… From California’s Lompoc Record, April 7:
North Korea: USA is “boiled pumpkin”
You've got to admit, this is pretty cool. From Bloomberg, April 10:
See, a regular love-fest. You don't think they're throwing each other a wink? One more:
We especially love that one. If any US politician had made such a comment, the idiot left factions shilling for the DPRK would be screaming "sexist!" But of course when North Korea does it, it is good Communist sexism, not evil capitalist sexism!
Enjoy the show, folks!
Oppa Pyongyang style!
The DPRK continues to send the surreal-o-meter into tilt. The NY Daily News May 29 reported on the latest K-pop sensation… from Pyongyang.
The text does not make clear what an accompanying Reuters photo reveals: the band performed at their inaugural gig last July against a giant screen backdrop with images from… Walt Disney! Specifically Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Right, we’ll nuke Anaheim, but not before emulating the globalist Borg! What did we say about North Korea being a giant theme park?